May.20.01

Hoo, boy. It's hard to believe it's already midway thru May! Where does that time go?? Where have Ibeen??

Gotta pay bills. Husband and I are conveniently forgetting the bills and they are going to be due very, very, soon. We recently got a bill from my dentist that is just under $1,000. Yes, that's right. I needed some major work and I know that that sort of thing costs money. Still, it was like a punch in the stomach, looking at that bill. I had really no idea it would cost that much.

Last week my friend S. called me and made a very definitive effort to make dinner arrangements with me. Just me, she said, no husbands, no other friends. I should have taken a cue from this, but I didn't see anything coming until we were mostly done with dinner. There we were, happily chit-chatting, and she drops the bomb. She's having surgery, and she's a little scared. What kind of surgery? I ask. Surgery to remove a polyp in her uterus.

Ohh.

So it comes out that she hasn't told anyone about the fact that she and K. have been trying for over a year to have a baby, and they haven't had any luck. They are going to a fertility specialist. It's been a terrible ordeal so far, and she's cried a lot, which is really saying something. S. doesn't cry about much. There's some hope-- the specialist says that they will get pregnant this year, but first the polyp must be removed. She says that she hasn't told any of our other friends because they might not understand. Some of them are single with no intention of having kids; a few are married and are having kids right now. And to make matters worse, her brother and sister-in-law just had a beautiful baby girl. The first baby in the family.

Ohh.

While she's telling me this, I am feeling so sad for her. It must be hard. I don't know yet if I can have babies either, because I had cancer as a teenager. What if I'm in the same boat a few years down the road? Also, while she's telling me her story, I'm realizing that I'm the only one outside of her husband who knows, and this is a kind of honor. I try my best to be supportive, I say everything I can think of that might make her feel better. I did my best. I'm not terribly good at it, but I tried very hard. I hope I did well. She's a good friend, and more than anything I want her and K. to be happy and have a kid. They would be the BEST parents in the world. I know it.

This weekend, we went to visit C.'s parents. Ah, Bob & Dot. They are the nicest, sweetest folks. They live in a bubble, but I don't mean that in a bad way. A typical visit with Bob & Dot consists of a lot of eating, card (or scrabble) playing, and sitting in various places, like the living room or the backyard. And a LOT of me watching my language. I have such a foul mouth, and I barely notice anymore that I talk like a truck driver most of the time. They're devoutly Baptist and in their mid-70's. You can tell Dot's getting up there, because she walks around in the kitchen all alone and talks to you (in a too-low, conversational-type voice) when you're in the living room. Just chatting away, and you can't hear a thing she's saying. Sad. We knew my grandma was getting a little dotty when she started doing that. Anyway, Bob is still as sharp as can be. He's an amazingly smart man, and he still uses his brain a lot. He's building his own plane! He's writing a detective novel--A Christian detective novel, no less!

This visit was bittersweet, because it was the last time we'll ever visit C.'s childhood home. Bob & Dot have lived in the same house for almost 50 years, raised six kids in the house, and now it's being bulldozed to extend the Indianapolis Airport. They bought Bob & Dot's house and they're going to bulldoze it and pave over it. Ah, progress. Bob & Dot seem to be taking it very well. I guess they got a really good price for the house, so that's good. C. tried to keep a good face on it for the parents, but he was visibly sad when we got in the car to go home. I can understand. Who wouldn't feel sad?

And in other news, I really, really, really need a haircut.

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